Mind critiquing my story for me?

This is obviously the beginning of something (or at least it has all the ingredients to be continued into a good story). Someone said that the character's tone changes through the story; I haven't noticed it. I think your thief is intelligent and ironic and the fact that he seems poetic at the beginning is just an appeareance. This reminded me a little of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, I don't know why, but this is the way I see it, full of funny intelligent comments and whimsy humour. Just think of a decent plot, keep the style and you might get something really good. I don't know, maybe he'll folow the woman and get into trouble? Remember that in a good story, every detail should matter; I mean, if you introduce a character, like you did with the 'harlot', you should have a reason for doing it.